My Cave

last weekend i went to langkawi on impulse. it was only my second time i went to the mahathir inspired tourist spot. i bought my air ticket on wednesday night and can't figure out which hotel to stay.i have choosen langkawi because of its nothingness. it lacks the beautiful white sands of perhentian, no bikini claded chicks of phukets, no surfing stunts and japanese hotties of bali, no crazy nightouts of phuket, no laid back resorts of koh samui, no nude beach and full moon party of koh phagan. but it's ok, i just need a place to cave.

when i went there for the first time 5 yrs ago with ny gf, i stumbled across this resort hidden in the jungle while driving aimlessly to kill time. it attracted me because there were these chalets built on steep slope, covered partially by the thick forest canopy. i never remember the resort name, only knew it was in northern part of the island.

so, after arriving at padang matsirat, i took a cab and asked this pak ngah to bring me to this resort in my mind. he said i was out of my mind coz it's bloody expensive. but he said most problably thats my best shot as other resorts should be fully taken. it's saturday and it's school holiday. i knew that. i dun want to stay in padang matsirat. there r few resorts here for families. i was alone. i dun want kids running around banging room doors. i just want a cave. cave of total silence.

when he brought me through this winding road to the mountain, i felt good, yes, the smell of jungle is what i missed, the slightly rotten smell of peat, yes. this is it. then here we were in datai, resort in the mountain. it somehow looked a bit different from the one in my memory. i got bad bad memory though..

the rate was crazy indeed. and i booked 2 nights. i didn't sleep that night until 3pm. just seeping beers by the varendah, staring into the dark emptiness, inhaling that jungle smell. i finished the entire 6 pack ,was so knackered, and slept till 11am the next morning. i ordered a breakfeast in bed and room massage. it's brilliant. by now i realised i came here not to do my thinking.thats bloody lame excuse. it's the quietness and the jungle smells i nearly forgotten which unconsciously leaded me here.

i thought i can come to brain-storm my options next year, whether to continue the contract for the current job or take up a new challenge in other company, what to do with my shoplot, which nobody calls for enquiry for the past 4 months, and whether or not to get married and settled down. big issues at hand. so, i just shut my mind and read murakami's norwegian wood for the 9th time. it never failed to thrilled me even after all these years. i took a simple dinner, and drank the penflock's shiraz though the night.

shit, i regretted and felt want to go home next morning. my thinking is done. no, actually, i knew what to do even before i came here. i just need a confirmation in a totally idle moment, pause of the moment thingie.

i went to do more spas and massage, facial spa, thermal stone thing, finished my book. i went out walking on the trails, then towards the trunk road and keep on walking. i haven't do this much walking for a long time. not since gunung ledang with wei chong 3 yrs ago. it went on for almost 3 hrs. at night, i tried to pick up paulo coelho's the valkyries but too knackered to read it. nah, i read it once d. let's do it another time.

packed my baggage and went back to chaotic kl next morning. my caving is done.

conclusion :
1) take up a new job next year. be it a challenging one. hoorah!
2) my id business. grab more jobs now. next yr will be bad. one step at a time.
2) can't do a thing abt the shop. either rent it at reduced price say 3500, wait & see. sell it 720 bottom. then can get 2 condo unit in my project.
3) getting married... hmm if i can get rid of my shop. more financial backup. let's do it in bali if gonna to do it.how much 40k, 50k... do some checkings.
4) gotta go back to gunung tahan again for good. 108km, blisters,leeches, walk like zombie, 30kg backsack, dried meat,wheat, no can foods, no maggie mee. 5 days. let's do it. train. gotta find some mates. next year, before new job.

hmm.. i didn't bring camera and handphone for the trip. 110 messages. these ppl never respect privacy.. asshole
end.